From the Unarchive: Doctor In Distress
You might be wondering, "How can a brand-new blog already have an archive?" Well, it’s because I’m not a novice to blogging. Based on my somewhat fuzzy count, this marks the third time I’ve tried it, or fourth time if you count my decade on LiveJournal. Maybe I'll be lucky this time and have it stick around!
I’ve saved some posts from my previous blogging adventures, so with that in mind, here’s an entry from 2016 that was posted on both my blog and as Metafilter entry. When you consider how long Doctor Who has been around, it's expected that the franchise has experienced good years and bad years. The following post talks about one aspect of a very bad year: the charity relief single "Doctor In Distress."
Note: From here on out, whenever I pull an article from the “unarchive,” I will verify any links that may have been included in the original. If I have to replace the links with one that has not rotted away, the link text will be highlighted. If I cannot find a valid link, the link text will be crossed out. Finally, any additional edits made to the original posts, whether to clarify a passage or something else, will be italicized and bolded.
What Do The Sex Pistols And Doctor Who Have In Common?
Originally published 2016-03-15
March 1985, England. The long-running BBC TV show "Doctor Who" was seemingly at its nadir* of its then 22-year history. The end of February saw the shock announcement that the sci-fi/fantasy show would be axed, though in reality, it was about to be placed on an 18-month hiatus. A series of bad decisions--poor casting choices, glossy production values to hide weak scripts, hanging on to dramatic surprises as a crutch, overly violent action--had led the show down a ratings and critical decline over the last 4-5 seasons. While much of the blame for the show's fortunes were placed on the shoulders of producer John Nathan-Turner, fingers could realistically be pointed in a number of directions: script editor Eric Saward, Sixth Doctor Colin Baker, Nicola Bryant as the Doctor's companion Peri, and so on. Articles and books have been written about that show’s tumultuous decade in the 1980s, far too many to link here, but instead of a rehash of all that, it’s time to look at one unfortunate artifact from the show’s hiatus: the “Doctor In Distress” charity single.
Ian Levine (previously, previouslier) was and is a self-professed "Doctor Who" fan whose love of the show has led him, in the current era, to rescue old episodes from the William Hartnell (First Doctor) and Patrick Troughton (Second Doctor) era. Back in the 1980s, he was an unofficial continuity advisor to John Nathan-Turner, so while his name did not appear in the show's credits, Levine assisted with script edits and suggestions. Levine, however, was much better known for his work as a Northern Soul/Hi-NRG DJ, being also the first resident DJ for the renowned London nightclub Heaven, and also as a record producer/mixer for Record Shack Records. In 1981, Levine had his first chance to combine these two worlds by writing music for the “Doctor Who” spin-off K9 And Company, but four years later, he was called upon to write a charity single whose proceeds would go toward funding the delayed 23rd season of Doctor Who. Recorded under the rather unfortunate name of Who Cares?, the “Doctor In Distress” single purportedly was to have featured contributions from Elton John and Holly Johnson of Frankie Goes To Hollywood fame, along with members of the Village People. Instead, the musicians included members of the Moody Blues, Ultravox, a pre-solo Basia, original cast members from Starlight Express, and keyboard work by some guy named Hans Zimmer. Cast members from Doctor Who also, er, sang, such as Colin Baker, Nicola Bryant, Anthony Ainley (who portrayed The Master), and Nicholas Courtney (who played Brigadier Lethbridge-Stewart).
The single was recorded on March 7th and 8th, and then released to an unprepared world on March 15, 1985. The BBC refused to play the song, claiming that it was of poor quality and the lyrics couldn't be clearly understood. Levine later reflected upon the song:
'It was an absolute balls-up fiasco. It was pathetic and bad and stupid. It tried to tell the Dr Who history in an awful high-energy song. It almost ruined me.'
So 31 years later, it's time to relive the struggle, the drama, and the love. Bring it back now, we won’t take less!
*Yes, it got worse than this. Much, much worse.
What I learned from editing this 11-year-old article was that the original assertion, in which funds raised from this single were to go towards keeping the show on-air, was incorrect. Instead, the UK-based National Society for Cancer Research was to receive all funds from the sales, but due to the staggering horror that was the song, no profits were raised. Being banned by the BBC, just like the Sex Pistols, didn't help either.
Ian Levine managed to do pretty well for himself post-charity single, particularly during his time producing the UK boy band Take That. He's still involved with Doctor Who to this day, though he's nowhere near as prominent as during the show's original run. Hans Zimmer, who hasn't been involved with Doctor Who since recording the song, has also done alright for himself.
Finally, if you aren’t too steeped in Doctor Who lore, the reference at the end about how “it got worse than this” was for Season 23, aka “Trial Of A Time Lord,” and for Season 24, Sylvester McCoy’s first as the Seventh Doctor. Nowadays, I have softened a lot on Season 24, as McCoy’s Seventh Doctor has grown in stature since his rather inauspicious beginning. Still, Season 23 remains a multi-stacked trainwreck, where the behind-the-scenes story ends up taking over what was shown on the screen, with neither side of the camera looking good in the process. A brief primer can be found in the old AV Club archives, which itself breaks up the “Trial Of A Time Lord” review into four parts. If you are interested/masochistic, you can give it a go:
- Part 1: The Mysterious Planet
- Part 2: Mindwarp
- Part 3: Terror Of The Vervoids
- Part 4: The Ultimate Foe
And with that, I’ll close the Unarchive. Until next time.